Other things I am doing to help myself: making a big visual schedule with tasks broken down into doable easy to remember steps, an emotion meter, a spoon meter, a washing roster on it with wash cycles on it, a flexible weekday plan/schedule, a crisis/emergency day plan, a job list of jobs broken down into small doable tasks. I will have a BIG warning on it saying that I only need to do what I can manage and to not get overwhelmed.
I am also hoping to buy the CAT kit by Tony Attwood as I believe it will really help me with my stress, anxiety, emotions and other things.
I am going to make up different scenario social stories to help me cope with the unpredictable from pixton.com.
I am in the process of trying to set up an emergency activity box for Possum on days where I am not coping and he's home. Ideally I would like to have a number of activities set up and ready to go.
I have just bought myself a small week to a page end of financial year diary (July 2013-June 2014) which will help me not to overload myself with appointments which happened this past week. I rely on my phone for appointments and set reminders for the, because I can't see the week laid out in a visual calander I have tend to book too many things for one week and then spend the following week in recovry mode. The week to a page diary will certainly help me achieve this. The Early Intervention Specialist told me to schedule in 'nothing days' where I just do nothing but self-care and whatever I feel up to doing.
All of the above things I need to do requires a lot of energy and money which I don't have enough of. I desperately need extra support and money to be able to do these things which is why I am hoping my disability appeal will be accepted.
With the visual schedule I don't even know how to break it down into smaller doable tasks. It feels rather overwhelming. Yet I desperately need it. It is the same for the other things I am trying to do. It is overwhelming and challenging. I am going to take it verly slowly and ask for help.
My executive function is low. I find it difficult to do basic things like cooking, cleaning, organising and relationships. I use most of my spoons trying to manage my life as it currently is with the responsibilities I have. Anything extra and unpredictable wears me out hugely. I don't have the energy to cope with anything extra. I am using my spoons to cope with what I need to do to cope better. It really is 1 step forward and 3 steps backward so I feel I am barely getting anywhere, that I am stuck in a vicious cycle.
This is not something I can just snap out of suddenly and I will be ok. There is no quick fix to this situation. I know what I need to do but it will take time to heal and improve.
I have this desperate need to write. I need to write it all out of my head, to help me process everything, to help me understand myself better. Writing is a necessity for me right now. I write in utter desperation to get it all out of my head, to finally understand myself. I will stay stuck if I do not write. I feel called to Advocate for myself and others on the Spectrum. I have finally found my calling.
I am at peace with where I am at right now.
Summarised version here.